mum life

2018 where are you?

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Hello spring are you there? Sure we are almost at summer and I’ve heard a lot of people say it doesn’t even feel like the year has even gotten started. I for one feel the exact same.

2018 was always going to be a year of change for the Felton’s. Ian started a new job, Josh would be starting school and we would be changing up our childcare as a result. We planned to get savings underway to finally get a chance to clear some small debit and look to getting a mortgage maybe next year. The world had other plans…and I’m not even talking about the snow that set everyone back a little.

In January we got news of Josh’s teeth, this had a knock on affect on a lot of things. I also found a lump on my breast that after several weeks of monitoring/doctors visits it turned out fine, thank god. I had also been struggling with my anxiety since later last year and these 2 events along with a number of small things going on in the background made it become unmanageable. I cant put my finger on the exact trigger but it also started to affect my mood/outlook and as much as I hate to admit it I think Josh picked up on a couple of things too and that was what spurred me to head back to my GP. I have been taking a low med for a few years now but decided to up my dose, my concern was Max is still feeding once or twice a day and I didn’t want to contend with stopping that too so the GP assured me that the % was so low that the benefit outweighed the ‘risk’. The cliché is a cliché for a reason-happy mama, happy babas so I went this advice and I’m slowly seeing the benefit. If something is not working try and change it for the better..

I am a real believer in if you have a positive mind, positive things will happen. In this crazy world we live in it can be hard to not let a bit of negativity drip in. However I have found more often than not that if you wake in the morning, you have a bright outlook suddenly even small things start going your way-‘you catch the bus, there is a place for you to sit in the coffee shop, the thing you hoped would be left in the shop is…there is a parking space’-you know the drill. With kids the predictability of life is challenging, the lack of sleep, the tantrums, the sickness that you can contend with on a daily basis, but this is stuff that all parents deal with on some level so moaning and groaning about it doesn’t help anyone it only puts you into that negative mind-set….and on the flip side you have kids that bring you daily joy and love and that is hard to beat. I have had to adapt my ways as most parents do, go with the flow a lot more-let go of the little stuff, focus on what is really important at any given time and that has been good for me-that’s what kids do-they ground you.

I wish for security for our family, I work part time but even looking at returning full time would not pay the dividend required to secure a home. We would love to grow our family at some stage in the future but right now that seems like a big mountain to climb. I think hope has to return, I read a quote recently-dreaming is a form of planning and as a natural planner this quote sticks well with me..but right now over planning ain’t for me!

So here’s to dreaming, here’s to positivity and here’s to the rest of 2018 kick starting the way so many of us thought it should!

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12 things I’ve learnt with 12 months with Max

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 1. There is more room in my heart and love I didn’t know possible-it was hard to imagine how I could love another child like I loved my first born Josh but once Max arrived the love was instant and deep.

2. Tiredness I didn’t know possible-if I thought I was tired pre baby or with one this was on another level and unfortunately continues to be with another bad sleeper in our lives but most days you just learn to live with it. 

3. Sibling bond-as an only child this was magic for me to watch, from very early on they became firm pals and even though Max is still small they manage to have great craic.

4. Learning to be a mum of boys-when fart noises, poo and general dirtiness becomes common place.

5. My heart is so full but so is my mind-there is literally ALWAYS something to do. 

6. I became knarkier in the last 12 months than probably ever before-see points 5 & 2 above! 

7. I’ve learnt to let things go a little-coming from a perfectionist in certain areas that was quite the challenge but it’s a case of having to sometimes…

8. Fun makes a family-it’s the simple days out together we have as a family of four that truly are the best.

9. It’s not just a myth your boobs can reach your belly button-😳 12 months of feeding and second time round and this is the result! 

10. Wine is no longer your friend, coffee is-a glass or two is perfection at the weekend but a hangover is beyond deadly with 2 busy boys so a coffee a day keeps the madness away.

11. Your time with your husband is precious but rare-this is something we both miss madly at times but we know these are the trench years and will also miss them when they are gone.

12. I realised quite quickly that once I had Max that my urge to be a mother to another baby was incredibly strong and 12 months on despite all the above and because of all the above that hasn’t changed if we are lucky enough of course and give me a year or two of our new normality before another comes into the mix!

Prepping for the end of Mat Leave with a Max

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My second maternity leave it just about to come to an end and I sure am going to miss my little buddy when I go back but there are bills to be paid and the bubble of the more blissful days of mat leave are definitely due to burst.

On my first maternity leave I was returning to the workforce after working for myself for 4 years, to a familiar office {I had worked for this company previously} but to a new job so that was a big adjustment in itself. This time I am returning to my part time role that I had started just before I got pregnant with Max. Max is starting in the same creche as Josh so there is some comfort in that too. It’s not so much the going back to work but the fact that such a special time is ending that is hard. 

I know from last time that the adjustment is not an easy one and life, if that is possible is about to become even busier so here are some of my tips/ideas that I am also going to implement to make it a little bit smoother:

{Batch Cook}-Just like before Max was born I plan on having a freezer full of go to meals/prepared nutritious dinners to make coming home from work but continuing to eat a lot easier.

{Online Shopping}-I do this sporadically now but plan on making this a regular weekly thing, getting it delivered and also ordering all my healthy meat options online too.

{Help around the House}-I am verging on OCD house proud and a clean/tidy house keeps me calm so I’ll be increasing my fornighly cleaner to weekly and that for me gives me a bit of sanity, it’s not for everyone but it’s definitely a treat I can justify. Also sharing the load of the other ‘jobs’ with my other half, which to be fair he is pretty good at and keeping things ticking over will be key to keeping us all calm!

{Planning}-Having the boys clothes ready, shirts and uniform ready on a Sunday makes mornings a little less rushed. Then also having nice plans made for the weekend will make the working week feel worthwhile. 

{Knowing there are going to be bad days}-All the above will help but there will be inevitable sickness {in the throws of it as we speak}, guaranteed tiredness and most certainly crankiness. So just remember the saying when these occur… this to will pass, it will and I’ll probably need to remind myself of that fact several times in early September.

{Enjoy it}-Use your bus journey to listen to a podcast, your lunch break to have a tasty peace filled lunch and any breaks you may have for a chance to get ‘life admin’ done with no interruption and with a hot cup of cofffee. That can’t be a bad thing so enjoy your little things about the changes. 

Oh and most importantly someone send the wine and lots of it… 😉