Months in and sickness returned to our house again unexpectedly. Josh had started to settle well in crèche since being moved rooms, work was going well and money was becoming a bit more free flowing. Things were on the up or so I thought. Josh hadn’t been sick for a couple of months but one Friday evening I noticed his eyes a bit gooey and then 3 huge vomits in the next 24 hours confirmed there was a little bug in his system. The weekend went fine, a trip to Airfield as new members, his first trip on a bus-the usual craic but by the end of the weekend I was unusually exhausted. At a personal training session on Monday night I felt pretty faint and by Tuesday I was like a zombie in work. Regrettably Wednesday had to be a bed day-10 hours sleep the night before had not done the job, I was wiped. The germs had crept in and dada had a sprained ankle so we were a house of crocs!
Looking back now I think my system is low, sickness in full fluey force returned at the weekend which enraged me to say the least! Things are going well but the adjustment has been huge and for months I think I’ve been hanging on by a thread, all the balls precariously up in the air and I have hit a wall. I beat myself up if I hit these walls and granted they don’t happen often, certainly less than they did years ago when I would perhaps indulge in them a little more. However one day of rest and bed bound at the weekend brought me the clarity to see two sides of the coin, try not get to the wall but if I do, that’s ok to-stop, rest & re boot!
Life as a working mama continues…
My 1st payday in 4 years arrived this week-was it worth it, I’m not sure, I’m still on the fence.
Let’s start with the pros…
•I’m really enjoying work, being out, interacting, using my brain and now having my own money.
•Financially it is definitely going to ease things and give more opportunities to our family.
•Josh really enjoys crèche and is happy going in each morning.
•The rejection has stopped, for now.
•Josh is eating well in crèche.
•My mum has been a great help despite on her first day of minding Josh was also sick.
•We have done a few nice family outings this month in between the madness
This month I’m afraid there are more cons…
•Josh has been sick twice in 2 weeks-tonsillitis and conjunctivitis.
•Josh hasn’t slept a full night in 3 weeks and as a result mama and dada are feeling the pain and he has had a minor personality transplant-terrible twos have kicked in at 15 months.
•I got the vommiting bug
•We got a puncture on the way to bringing Josh to the doctor.
•Ian got conjunctivitis
•We failed the NCT
•Josh still not napping in crèche which means we get a overtired boy every evening we collect him.
•Ian and I are like passing ships in the night, snapping at eachother like overtired crocodiles at the smallest thing.
I question have we done the right thing but I know something had to change and the choices we’ve made long term I think are the right ones-My work choice (going back to familiar faces) and the crèche (they seem to be v good). I also know I am enjoying getting some independence back and that’s not something I want to let go of now but when Josh and our family are suffering as a consequence then that makes me feel selfish. I also know my husband was wise leading us down this path because financially while we could ‘get by’ that doesn’t bode well for the future and that’s not the life we want for Josh.
There is no denying it’s been a tough month but I am hopeful for the future, for February, we are calling it the start of our year because whilst I know we face other challenges ahead it was the speed at which they came in those first 3 weeks that floored us a little. So time to press the restart button and enjoy the new phase of our life, a little more prepared perhaps for any bumps in the road!